What would you do if you tried to keep your friend from driving his motorbike early in the morning of a sunday after a night out, you even tried to keep the keys of the motorbike away form his hands but he insisted, and ultimately got the bike keys and drove it anyway? What would you do and how would you feel if your friend died that day, after driving away drunk? Just like that.
First of all don't blame yourself - cry all you want but don't blame yourself. You tried to stop your friend from driving but there exist a point of self responsibility where you cannot decide for another - you can't tie someone up and decide he or she won't move from the same place until they are sober, you don't have that power, and specially when your friend is bigger and stronger than you, and a bit drunk, you can't play the game of hiding the keys for so long. Of course if you were to knew this would have happened you would have trown the keys of the motorbike into the river or far away - to completely avoid the situation for your friend - but you didn't know better. And next time a friend tries to drive drunk, you should indeed throw the keys to the river no matter what the friend says to you - but you didn't know better and your friend A, probably talked you into you giving him the keys of the motorbike with any and all excuses.
You didn't know better at the time, you did all you could, you already had the good intention of preventing him to drive but even though A might have been a bit drunk, or drunk - he had a point of self responsibility - meaning it was His Responsibility whatever happens to him in what he decides to do, to drive or not to drive in that drunk state. We are all Responsible for ourselves, even when we decide to do drugs or alcohol, we are always responsible. And maybe for all we know it was his time to go and he unconsciously took the decision to go away. Maybe it is for the best that he has parted ways - who knows, he is for sure not finished/dead/done he continued to new paths and know this he is very proud of you and for sure the last thing he would want is for you to carry the burden of his death on your back, first of all it is not a load, he simply changed positions, and second of all He decided it to be that way - by taking the motorbike when he didn't have to, his ticket to heaven - where he is safe and sound.
See, that morning I woke up early and went to the local festivities too, they were closing, it was 6 in the morning and it was about to become a new day, I asked the security guys at the concert place when the sun would go up because I wanted to know when the new day started because I had decided to stop smoking by then, and they told me at around 7 the day would be on. So I wanted patiently for 7 in the morning to come, and smoke some last cigarettes before stopping smoking. While I was at this, not only the day came but A went away. If A didn't go away you might probably never find out about this blog and about the existence of afterlife as I will share with you. And J, remember I would never play or share something I am not sure in this difficult situation you are going through. If I decided to share this with you is because I think it is the best I can do and because A would have liked you to know that he is indeed Fine and on his process in the dimensions. It will take a while for you to understand all the information probably, or maybe not, but know this - He is fine and You have no responsibility in his death - it was his decision.
Ruben
Cheers and a hug
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