Day 76: Patience With Change

Sometimes I want to change very fast and reality shows me otherwise, that it can take time for change to be implemented. Today I felt somnolence during the day and allowed myself to sleep eventhough I know I should have pushed to do things, but hey it is not to judge me, next time I will do better.

Who says the process of change is linear? Where we simply do it better and better every day? Changing also means 'fucking up' so we can learn from our mistakes, changing doesn't mean that every day we do a bit more without making mistakes. Making mistakes is beneficial because we know what happens if we go that specific rute, if we behave in a particular way.

So we have to have patience with change, because some days will feel like a success but some other days can look like a failure, but if you really look at failure as the mistake to learn from it, then it is not a day lost but used to better self in the process of change. Miss Take, if you Miss a Take you Take another Take Bernard Poolman said.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myelf to want to change immediately.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to be effective at everything immediately.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that change will take time.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that it will take daily self-discipline to implement change in my life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to get resutls fast when it comes to changing habits.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself if I don't see change, instead of having patience.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to live the word patience to its utmost potential.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that in the process of change it may feel as if I go back at times, I fall back, but it is merely part of the journey onwards.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that progressing/changing only means doing it better day by day, when in fact it can mean fucking up some days/not being effective some days so we know what to do next time in a similar situation/we know what happens if we behave a certain way.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go to sleep when I feel somnolence instead of pushing myself to stay awake and do physical things.