Day 192: Change the World

I am only one, I am responsible for myself - Sometimes I put on 'the weight of the world' but this is only an excuse to not have to change myself, because apparently 'I have to change the world' - I will never change the world - but I can change myself and affect world change.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I have to become a super-being or super-hero of some kind to be able to 'change the world'

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to change the world

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that I am responsible for myself alone

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to put on the 'weight of the world' without seeing, realising and understanding that it is merely an excuse to not change myself

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see that I alone will never change the world

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see that if I change I can affect world change

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to take my process of change seriously

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to put an emotional charge to 'changing the world' instead of changing myself here as breath

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that I come first 'self first'

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see that I am not alone

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear instead of realizing that fear is an illusion

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to let me drift from thing to thing without applying myself effectively

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see that with every day that I write I will be stronger and stronger or more aware

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give up on myself when I see 'changing the world' as too much, without seeing realizing and understanding that the 'wanting to change the world' is not a valid starting point without first having sorted myself out.

I commit myself to change myself first

Whenever I see I 'want to change the world', I stop and I breathe, I realize it is a distraction to not have to change myself thus I let it go.

Day 191: Back to Blogs

 More than a week later, I am back to write blogs. Excuses, believing I am not good enough, general 'disenchantment with the world' are all not valid, I will push for one blog a day no matter what. After all, 7 years of writing do not get written for themselves.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give up on myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to keep quiet

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not support myself in writing

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see that I have to support myself in writing

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I am not good enough

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see that if I don't push myself to write daily I will not

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react to where I am now, instead of seeing that I can move out of it

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to let the days pass without writing blogs

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to disregard the self support and the support of others that my blogs can have

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to value my blogs

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand how much less people will stand up for themselves if I do not stand up for myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge writing a blog as difficult

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see that writing daily is an act of awareness and my mind will always come up with excuses to not do it

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see the potential I have through writing this blogs - of who I can assist without ever knowing it myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become 'disenchanted with the world' as in 'not being content with what I have' and 'want more' and within this 'want to give up'.

I commit myself to push for one blog a day

I commit myself to remind myself of the importance of writing blogs, for me and others to stand up

I commit myself to remind myself that only excuses will make me  not to write daily and excuses are not valid

I commit myself to remind myself that I have to stand and write daily not only for myself but for others as well

I commit myself to, whenever possible, publish one blog a day for 7 years.

Day 190: How To Slow Down

If you can read through this maybe it is not for you, if you think you can't, this is for you.

Two things have allowed me to slow down the last few days: Starting to Read the Desteni Articles from the beggining which resulted in/led to = wanting to Understand things and people. 

You see, from reading the articles by Desteni you gain so much insight in how reality works/is changing that then you want to naturally be aware of everything going on around you, here is more:

First came the decision of 'till here no further', where I saw I needed to go and really start from the begining reading the articles by Desteni from the beggining, which I had never done, only ever reading articles here and there, big mistake as there is a saying of 'Read the damn material' - 

From there a newfound curiosity arose, of really appreciating things by Looking into them - Because I found so much cool things in the Articles by Desteni that now I am looking at reality with eyes wide open!

So for instance Before = I would scroll through facebook like a zombie, barely reading and skipping things so fast, taking them for granted As If I already knew with reading a few words what was it all about -- whereas now that I take my time wich each post really wanting to Understand where the being that posted that comes from --hell, even the adverts on Youtube Music that used to annoy me I really hear, hear the voice of the person doing the pitch and what the advert is conveying - if it is a long advert I can skip it as well, I don't have to hear Everything, this is more for the unavoidable ones.

From this, I realized that I thought I had patience but I did not. Because I could not sit and read an article, I could not sit and read a blog, maybe if I was really interested yes - but it is difficult to find gems without really digging the soil/reading through Blogs and Articles, because gifts are for the deserving lol, those that read through. I hope you found a little gem, if not let me try my best in the final sentences. 'If you are not informed you are not in form/you are not in shape and you are weak.' And you can really inform yourself by slowing down and Reading the Damn Material - or is it the other way around? lol - on Desteni.org Articles, there is a spreadsheet too keep track of what you have read and to find the articles in order or by author. Enjoy.

Day 189: Lag Behind

 Lag: hang (back) or fall (behind) in movement, progress, development, etc

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compare my process to that of others

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I should be somewhere that I am not

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to have patience with myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I am less for not being where others are

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel shame for not applying myself effectively

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that the past is gone and that I merely have to learn from it to not repeat the same things again

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to be grateful for my past as without it I would not be where I am today

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to be proud of myself for sticking with and not giving up on myself

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to use my past to serve me as the definitive lesson to stand up for myself

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to say: I am grateful for my past for I am here now

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I have to be ashamed of my past

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that being ashamed of my past will only hinder my application in every moment of breath

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to embrace everything of me

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that in fact I asked for everything that happened to me in my past, so that I would stand up for myself once and for all

Day 188: Jordan Peterson: What Would You Be Like?

What would you be like if you'd stop wasting time? Moreover, what would you be like if you did what you know you have to do for 10 years, where would you be? Who would you become?

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to waste my time

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not use my time effectively

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not dare myself to use all my time effectively

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not do what I know I have to do

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in distractions

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand the practicality of simply doing what I have to do at All times

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to disregard self-direction whenever I go on distractions

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to try to escape reality with entertainment

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to try to escape reality with sleeping

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that I can be and become so much more if I start using the opportunities as Time that I have on my hands

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to limit myself by not facing myself in every moment of breath

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see the practicality and how easy it is in fact to walk breath by breath

Day 187: The Nature of Problems

In front of problems a tendency might arise of simply covering one's head like an ostrich to not have to face reality. But what if problems where merely an indicator that we have to change directions and that all will be well? Yes, we might have to get creative but in front of problems, getting creative and not giving up is the best we can do, after all, a new adventure and gifts might lie in the new path that we take. A river does not stop when it hits a wall, it simply detours.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not take it easy on myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to look at the problem instead of looking at the solution

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see opportunities that problems present

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be stubborn in only seeing one path, and if that path fails, not see anything else

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to be creative when problems arise

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that I am more capable than I think

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see that I am capable of doing a lot of great things

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that only if I give up do I become stagnant

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that problems are not necessarily bad

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see that problems might uncover a better path

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that I can get creative in front of problems

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give up in front of problems

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see that problems are not really problems but diversions on the route to take

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that taking different routes when problems arise can be a good thing

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that the route I have to take is what I thought in my mind, without seeing, realising and understanding that problems can arise which are simply route changers