Day 224: Creative Powers

Bipolar is fun - but has consequences -, that is the highs, thats why myself and others, there was a time that I didn't want to take medication for it. Because medication can make you feel normal - how horrible! - Or low, which is worse.

Because when I was in a manic high I could from my point of view, do anything, achieve anything and talk to anyone super elocuently. Eventhough I might come out as a nut to other people, I had a high drive and belief that I could do anything!

Because I could believe I was able to do anything, I would go for dubvious ventures that were out of the scope, like a supermarket chain once for example, I believed I could create that. And as time progressed then I wold think something else so nothing was done. 

But in terms of communication, I was able to communicate more with other people, even do some magic tricks with money on the spot (see speending too much money), so basically I had a lot of fun in my manic highs of bipolar.

I want to move this pure, raw belief in myself to my day to day life where I am on a normal state. Because what can one be able to accomplish with pure belief in oneself and with detailed action that not being manic gives you.

A realisation: I am not two persons, one manic and one normal or non-manic. I am one person, and whatever I was able to do while manic I can do while 'normal'.

When I was manic I had this radical belief in myself, that I could do anything, all encompassing and so big that I felt so good and everything I put myself to do, I would trust myself completely, like playing a piano in a restaurant, eventhough I didn't take one piano lesson in my life I did that.

So with that my creative powers were heightened because:

- I believed in myself 100%

- I thought I could do and achieve anything

- I wanted to have fun and others have fun with me

That is the key points.

See how interesting it is the third point: Once I believe that I can do and achieve anything there is one thing that arises and it is: To have fun. I wanted to have fun and have all others have fun with me, so I would for example share and be more active in Instagram with my adventures and I got feedback that people enjoyed it.

So once we break the barriers that we cannot change this world and we in fact believe and do it, the next point will be Having Fun together.

Disclaimer: Hipomania can lead to full blown mania, psych hospitalization and loss of money in many cases (overspending).